The Club No One Wants to Join

My initiation was quick, but hardly painless. Welcome to the club that no one wants to be a part of. In this club IV’s, doctor’s offices, chemo and the occasionally radiation is standard. You never think cancer will happen to you or your family, and then it does. In a blink of an eye you start to feel different from everyone else, it’s like you have a giant ‘C’ taped to your forehead. At times you feel different, odd and distant from others. Having coffee with a friend can turn very awkward when they are sharing about how much their life sucks, then they look at you and remember; oh yeah you’re dealing with cancer. When people find out my mom has been diagnosed with an aggressive cancer, they treat me differently. People seem gentler towards me as if I am suddenly so breakable that they need to be careful around me. Honestly, there’s days when I come home after a long weekend of taking care of my mom and I feel like I’m in a thousand pieces. Cancer invades not only bodies but also lives; it changes relationships for good and for bad. Some days I wake up and think that this whole thing has been a dream but shortly realize THIS is reality. I am a part of this Cancer club and unfortunately membership is not voluntary. Here we are for the good and bad, and really all we can do is keeping moving forward. Cancer has destroyed my life in many ways, but it’s also brought about positive changes too. My family has had no choice but to team up against this enemy, making us closer than ever before. It’s also given us a perspective on life. The things that used to bother us seem pretty unimportant now. It’s definitely caused me to realize how temporary life is. We are never guaranteed tomorrow, although most of us live life that way. All we have is this very moment, so we have to stop putting things off, worrying about the future and just live our lives today. So here I am, a part of a club no one wants to join. It’s always someone else until it’s you.

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